If I do go back NOW, it will be 2 years ahead of my targeted ‘back to work’ date/time. If I go back NOW, the kids are still young. If I go back NOW, a lot less freedom. We met hubby’s old friend and his family last night at the theatre. The whole family (their 7 year old boy and 2 year old daughther). Although, the movie was not exactly age-appropriate for the girl but then, for good measure, I kept my mouth shut. Anyway, so we met them, the wife has just gotten off work and off they went to spend some quality family time.

You know, I was thinking, if I work now, I will not get to spend much time at home and life will not be as laid back as what I am enjoying right now. The kids are not rushed. Not that they take their own sweet time, just that life is not one activity after another and we don’t always have to rush. I don’t really want my life to be a constant rush after another. No time to really take in all that we are doing, just getting through one after another. I’d much rather have quality than quantity. Having lots doesn’t mean squat if you don’t even know or realise what just happened.

Besides, going back to work means having to look for jobs. Unless you are the privilege few (which in this case, wont be me), I will have to go through interviews, sending out resumes, waiting in line, prospective employers doing pre employment background checks, going for medical check-ups, dealing with first-day jitters, establishing rapports with fellow workmates, standing out without offending anyone, learning your new boss, getting around, getting into the A-list…you know, the list goes on and on and on…

Going back to work, whether you’re starting at the top or bottom, is always the same. People are often threatened and not accepting of new faces. It’s like a threat to their already comfortable bubble. People generally don’t deal well with new ones. Of course, you can try and may appear to succeed but their acceptance of you may be masked with underlying reasons. It’s a common phenomenon everywhere. Not everyone gets the like button at first. It just takes a while to earn the trust.

So you see…having to go through the motions, sacrificing the family and perhaps even for pittance, I always wonder if it is all worth it. No amount is too small of course. Every cent counts.

It’s been a constant struggle for me with regards to this. I am convinced that it will continue to be a struggle for a long time to come. Guess that’s what life is all about, ain’t it? Not a bed of roses.

We have extremely busy the past couple of weeks leading up to the year end. FOr one thing, we plan on renovating our house a little bit. We’ve never done much to our house ever since we moved in more than 6 years ago, and we figured  now is probably a good time to be doing something. As a result, we have been busy firstly, deciding what we want to do. Not easy because of space constraints. Besides, we don’t plan to do too much seeing as how we want to live in a home and not in a show-house. Plus the fact that the hubby and I, we’re both sentimental freaks — there are just way too many stuff we want to keep. But, no we don’t want to go down the hoarder road so we have been careful.

Apart from that – I say this every year – I have a personal goal I intend on achieving. It’s funny for someone who doesn’t work to have a ‘goal’ but yeah, I do. It’s weird I know but in all fairness, my intentions are good. I will have to make sure that it happens next year. At least, I want it to happen.

2012 will no doubt be another crazy busy year for us. Not only for me, but for the rest of us in the family. We don’t know where the road will take us but we are hopeful that the path will be filled with adventure.

SO, have a great and fabulous Christmas in the meantime. An exciting new year awaits..:-D

But, I still love them shoes. I can never get enough of them. The only problem is, I don’t get to wear them often enough for me to go get some of them. And, I love heels too. And yes, where am I going to wear them to?? **sigh**

OK, I am sure you probably have had many ‘a time of your life” but last couple of days for me have been a blast. I will tell you that there were fits of laughter, tears of joy as if we were a bunch of Casablanca fans. I have never had such fun since…since…I was 16 heheh..

I am so so tired. Out of the group, i’m probably the least fit. I should begin running like the rest.

Maybe I’ll start tomorrow. Oh wait — let me start later in the week. Lazy bum!! LOL..Who am I kidding? I won’t even last out the drive-way!!