There was an opportunity for me to blog about an issue pertinent to women. What did I do? Jump at it of course. Not because it looks good on my blog (it does, by the way. Writing about women issues always perks a woman blog up) but because self esteem is something women across the board battle with, constantly. Either they have it or they lack of it. Either way, its one of the most talked about issue but appears not enough of.

I am a victim. Which is why I decided to write something about it. I can blame it on my childhood, treatment from my parents. I am never good enough, not pretty enough, not hardworking enough, not studious enough…the list can go on and on. They always compared me with kids of their friends, my friends, kids who they see in the newspaper, on television. How everyone was better than me and I should be like everyone else but me.

This affected me because I grew up always needing approval over and over. If someone told me I was pretty, I didn’t believe them. If someone told me I was smart, I didn’t believe them. I never felt I was good for anything and anyone. Even until now when I have a beautiful daughter and a wonderful husband, this self doubt is still there.

Many have said that self esteem issues stem from childhood and how you were treated during that time. While it may be true to a certain extent but I doubt that even in a perfect state, a person escapes the lack of confidence or if you had a less than perfect childhood, you are doomed for life. I know of personal friends who decided that they needed to take charge of their lives when no one will and do something about it. They started to believe in themselves. They worked hard at making themselves feel good inside and out. Organizations like Dove realized that self esteem issues are very real especially among girls/women. They have come up with a campaign called “Join Dove to Raise Self Esteem” where they aim to help millions of affected young girls/women out there in raising self esteem.

I am still struggling, really. Its not easy but the one thing I learned is that as humans, we have flaws. We are who we make ourselves to be. The most beautiful person can be ugly on the inside. We make the best of what we have and to our capabilities. To be confident when no one shares the same thoughts. Its not easy but it boils down to us, deep inside where only we have access to, no one else. We have to learn not to let the past dictate our future. We can’t choose our family but we sure as hell can choose us.